We Survived Blizzard February 1 & 2, 2011

Yumi was not happy she couldn't watch her birdie friends, but at least the drifting kept stray Tom away from her window.

DH and I both stayed home from work. We actually had no choice. Local roads were closed due to drifting.

I don't know what our official inch total was, but it was the sustained 35 mph winds with gusts up to 70 that made it a brutal blizzard. All night long it was very noisy out there. We lost power a few times, but thankfully it went back on before we got too chilled without heat. We found pieces of the house being constructed next door in our yard, but thankfully our house appears to be intact.

Due to the storm, I ended up with two nights off. I don't want to think about the lower number on my future paycheck. It was nice to have the time off to heal up my thrown out shoulder. It still hurts when I take a deep breath, but at least I can find a comfortable position to sit or lay in now. I've been trying to stretch it out and drink more fluids to help with the inflammation. 

The boys enjoyed having friends over due to schools being closed. It seems hard to believe its also time to see the homeschool posse, but tomorrow is Thursday already. These past two days seem to have flow by despite us being snowed in.

When I was feeling up to it, I studied more of the Gabriel Method. I'm having trouble visualizing my ideal body. I can't think of a time in my life when I didn't feel fat.

I know in high school I had a regular woman's body, but compared to my not yet "developed" friends, I always felt fat. DH says I should use a photograph of myself during that time, but mentally my high school body wasn't something I was comfortable with then, so why would it work for me now? I've thought about using magazine photos and plastering my face on them, but I don't like that idea. I'm just going to have to dig deeper and find out why I can't see myself as a thin, healthy person. 

I think it does have something to do with not wanting to be a sex object. If you're laughing, that's okay. :) It makes me laugh too, but I know on another level, there's truth to this.  Last night I had a dream where I was groped by some jerk. I think on a subconscious level I see thin as sexy and sexy as not safe.

There's a creepy dad at the pool who constantly stares at my chest making me feel uncomfortable. I think I need to empower myself to not feel so threatened by the attention of men. I think it goes way back to age 12. Those bra snapping middle school boys traumatized me! LOL!

I certainly want to feel sexy for DH, but how do I accomplish this without the concern I'm soliciting unwanted attention from other men? I'll have to work on this while practicing my visualization sessions.

Well, that's probably TMI for all of you, but my blog is my journal and how I work stuff out in my head. Read at your own risk. :) 

The birds are in a feeding frenzy at the feeder. They must somehow know the storm is on the way in.

Ready For The Blizzard & Organizing

I hit up the Pig to round out the fridge and pantry supplies, and I grabbed every available copy of Mother Earth News our small library had on hand. I'm now officially ready to ride out this 3 day snow event. I can plan my garden while watching the white out.

It sounds like the pool will close, but even if it doesn't my wonderful boss said she'd cover for me so I don't have to worry about driving through the blizzard conditions. That's such a huge relief to me. I can actually tolerate winter pretty well, its the driving in it that stresses me out.

We spent this past weekend in the nest, purging and fixing up the larger storage area of our basement. I would have taken a before photo, but I feared we'd be contacted by the producer of Hoarders.

We bought two steel wire shelf racks from Target and with each paycheck, I'm going back for another one until our basement storage area is wall to wall racks. These units came together very quickly without tools and each shelf holds 350 pounds.

The first rack we built is holding appliances and other kitchen items that don't get used on a regular basis. It looks like something you'd see in a professional kitchen! The second rack is being used for DH's old stereo and computer equipment until he figures out what he wants to do with it.

Our future plans include a unit for seasonal decorations, and old toys the boys don't want to part with just yet. We also have a cookie jar collection from our B.C.,(before children), days that we'd like to organize. We're hoping we can rotate out the jars for displaying, rather than always keeping them in their storage boxes like we're doing now.

We still have quite a bit of purging and organizing to do, but it feels great to be started on it. We may even have room to set up a table on which I could work on projects.

We've made two runs to Goodwill with trunk fulls of cast offs. I'm sure they'll be plenty more in the next several weeks. Its getting easier to pitch rather than keep as we begin to see everything organized on the shelving units.

The only downside to all this cleaning has been I've tweaked something with my shoulder and back. I'm not sure what I lifted that did it, but I've got this strange pain the front of my chest and in the back on my shoulder blade. I'm thinking it all has to do with my shoulder being strained somehow. It feels like something a chiropractor could "pop" back in, but I don't have chiropractor funds right now. I'll keep hugging my rice pack and hope it gets better quickly.

Chocolate Chip Cookies- America's Test Kitchen recipe

Description:
This is by far, the best chocolate chip cookie I have ever eaten. Perfect consistency and the best flavor I've experienced in a chocolate chip cookie recipe, this technique developed by ATK really is the best.

The only changes I made were to form the cookies smaller, (working on my portion control these days), I used dark chocolate chips rather than the typical semi-sweet, and I added 1 1/3 cup of chips rather than the 1 1/4 cup. I didn't use any nuts either. The ATK original recipe wants you to divide the dough into 16 cookies, but those most be huge.

Ingredients:
1 3/4 flour
1/2 t baking soda
14 T of unsalted butter, (1 3/4 sticks)
1/2 C sugar
3/4 C dark brown sugar
1 t salt
2 t vanilla
1 L egg
1 L egg yolk
1 1/3 C of dark chocolate chips

Directions:
Preheat oven to 375

Over medium-high heat, melt 10 T of butter, about 2 minutes. Cook the butter another 1-3 minutes, stirring, until the butter develops a light brown color.

Add the melted butter to your metal mixing bowl and stir in the remaining 4 T of butter. Stir until its all melted.

Add the sugars, salt and vanilla and whisk until mixed.

Add the eggs and mix for 30 seconds.

Allow the mixture to rest for 3 minutes, then whisk again for 30 seconds. Repeat this process 2 more times.

Mix the flour and baking soda in a small bowl.

Add the flour mixture and chips into the butter, sugar, egg mixture and mix just until combined.

Use a cookie scoop or spoon to form small balls, about a tablespoon big. Bake 2 inches apart for 9-11 minutes.

Yes, I'm Mental Today

I'm making progress because the more I push through, the more I feel the push back.

I've been focusing on releasing fears and stress, trying to calm my mind. I'll reach a peaceful state only to have a flood of fear and tension return. I'm choosing to believe that as I get stronger, my mind knows I can take more on.

I recognize now the increased feelings of fear and stress are really nothing to FEAR and be STRESSED about. They only make me stronger because as they scream back at me, I have the opportunity to once again leave them behind. They may scream louder, but I grow stronger having had all of this practice at acknowledging them and releasing them. Eventually all of this negative energy will burn itself out because I've turned up the heat!

I know there are changes happening in my body as well. The foods I crave, the portions I eat, its all changing without me having to really worry about it. I understand now how worrying about what I ate, only added to the giant stress ball, rolling me away from my goals. Its interesting how actions I thought would help me were really trapping me. 

I had very strange rage dreams. I was surrounded by mess and clutter, and I just kept screaming my head off, incoherently. I woke up thinking, whoa! Where did that come from? My subconscious knows I'm now reaching for order and peace. I expect it now to work with me rather than against me. It pitched a temper tantrum but that's over now. It's time to partner up and make this work!

Love In Every Sip, Weekend Fun

Do you like my new tea bowl, I mean tea mug? DH insisted on buying it for me because he said it was made for me. I love the color, and I love drinking tea. Its great to brew two cups at once, and I'm sure it will make a wonderful ice cream, I mean, cereal bowl as well. Its making a great hand warmer too, since it takes both of mine to hold it.

Sunday Bloody Sunday, poor DS soon to be 12 had several flash flood nose bleeds. I think the sight of all the blood made him feel ill the rest of the day and night. He said it looked like a crime scene and in truth it did. I tried to clean everything up as best I could, but I'm sure if Dexter Morgan shows up with his blood spill kit, I'm busted. It can be very scary seeing blood gush out of you like that. I assured him he wasn't going to die and we just kept applying pressure. The bleeds would stop but an hour or so later another tsunami would surprise us. So far this morning, he seems to be doing okay except for a little bit of a sore throat.

In between nose bleeds, we remarkably all enjoyed lunch at Red Lobster in honor of DS soon to be 12. He ate his fill of cheddar biscuits. I told the waiter to skip the birthday sundae and just bring DS his own basket of biscuits.

There was a family party sitting near us celebrating their patriarch's milestone. He didn't get a sundae either but rather a large glass of chocolate milk! :) I don't know how old the gentleman was, but as I watched him, I hoped my son would some day be that blessed to be sitting in Red Lobster surrounded by his great grandchildren. 

Pesto Cavatappi - My version of Noodles and Company's

Description:
I love the Pesto Cavatappi at Noodles, and for awhile now, I've thought it couldn't be that difficult of a recipe to replicate at home and save a few bucks. I did a bit of research, and decided to try and make a version with a little less calories than the Noodles version.

I thought this came out wonderful. It wasn't as green as the dish is at the restaurant, but it still tastes delicious. Noodles must add tons of pesto to their mushroom sauce to make theirs that green. I saw the calorie count on the side of the pesto jar and couldn't bring myself to use more than a spoonful. I replaced non-fat yogurt for the traditional heavy cream, although the next time I make this, I may try using non-fat cream cheese.

Ingredients:
1 1/2 C cavatappi noodles
1 T olive oil or just enough to coat the bottom of your skillet
1 T Smart Balance spread or use butter
1 1/2 C sliced mushrooms
2 T white wine
2 T non fat plain yogurt
2 T pesto
1 large or 2 smaller Roma tomatoes, sliced
3 cloves of garlic, mashed and diced

Garnish with grated Parmesan cheese

Directions:
Cook your cavatappi noodles according to the packaged directions to al dente

Lightly coat the bottom of your skillet with olive oil and melt the Smart Balance or butter. Add the mushrooms to your skillet and saute. Once the mushrooms are tender, stir in the splash of wine, yogurt, pesto, tomatoes and garlic. Lastly add your cooked cavatappi and stir/toss to coat. Heat until the pasta is once again hot. Sprinkle Parmesan on top if desired.

Its wrap yourself up like a burrito day.

Thoughts For Thursday 1/20/11

The death cold is coming. Remind me again why -20 below is necessary for the environment?

I threw in extra onions and loads of garlic in today's batch of black bean tomato stoup. I'm surrounded by people eager to share their viruses. My immune system needs all the help it can get.

I'm becoming more aware of people's energy, or to be more precise, people's negative energy. They aren't helping me reach that "Chillax" state of being I hope to achieve this new year. Guess I need to learn how to deflect their negative vibes.

Last night my heart was breaking for a little Chinese girl at the pool. Her father was telling me she said she wanted to be a cleaner when she grew up. He was really concerned about this. I said, "Hey, she'll always have job security and as long as she's happy, right?" He protested replying his daughter would not clean for a living.

The little girl then chimed in with a smile on her face, "I want to be a preschool teacher!"

I said to her, "That sounds like fun!"

Dad replied, "NO! If you want to be a teacher, you can teach college students." 

I swear, some people don't get it. Allow your children to follow their dreams.

I recently read although Chinese students excel in math and science, they lack creativity because at a very young age, they are pushed academically.

My state is actually trying to offer 4 year old kindergarten and people are lining up to get their 4 year olds in the door. Another lawmaker is trying to pull the plug on 4 year old kindergarten. Frankly, my state doesn't have the money, plus, why the rush to pull young children away from their families? So many parents think this will give their children an academic advantage and save them daycare dollars. As a homeschooling parent, I will tell you my children learned more at home, with a very low teacher- student ratio, and a loving, safe environment.

I better get off my soapbox and get moving. 

8 a day - REALLY? 8 A DAY?? I've had a tough enough time trying to get 5 in. I do enjoy fruit and veggies though. I guess I will just have to be more creative and add a few more to breakfast and snacks. http://abcnews.go.com/Health/heart-health-fruits-veggies-life-saving/story?id=12639620

What We've Been Up To...

I haven't been ignoring you. I've just been distracted by the following.

America's Test Kitchen - I can't believe this has been in existence for over a decade, and I'm just now discovering it. I need to make a point to watch more public television. I knew about the magazine Cook's Country, but I wasn't familiar with the entire franchise. I love how the recipes are tested over and over until they've worked out the best method.They explain the science behind the recipe, and they also have great kitchen product reviews. Its sort of like Alton Brown's Good Eats and Consumer Reports only done much better. Here's the link to America's Test Kitchen, but I feel like everyone already knows about this brilliant show except me because apparently I've been living under a rock.

Our other TV fascination lately has been Forensic Files. DS11 is especially into it. Its a 30 minute documentary style show featuring real life crimes solved through the science of forensics. I asked DS11 if he's thinking about becoming a forensic scientist, but he's still says he wants to be a police officer.

We're getting ready to celebrate DS11's turn to DS12 in a few days. I can't believe my baby is 12. 12!!!! We'll celebrate early this weekend, since both DH and I will have to work on his actual birthday. He wants to go to Red Lobster and eat a basket full of cheddar baked biscuits. He doesn't want the birthday sundae, just bring him his own basket of cheddar baked biscuits with a side of ranch sauce to dip into. LOL!

I'm reading the book The Gabriel Method by Jon Gabriel. The book is making me think about weight loss in an entirely different way. Jon used to weigh over 400 pounds but lost over 200 pounds once he figured out his "fat switch" was turned on. The book is revealing to me how stress and my fears of scarcity have triggered my body to want to stay fat for survival. I am trapped by an emotional obesity and the next few weeks, I'm really going to start to explore why I've done this, and how I will break free and turn off my "fat switch."  I know what I should eat, yet I starve my body from the nutrition it needs. I need to completely change my mindset away from fear and worry, and focus on the abundance around me and my ability to reach a life I've dreamed of living. I'm excited to take this journey!

Friday Five 1/14/11

"Since this is National Thank You month, and so many times little things, like how much we appreciate people can go by and we just don't get them said.  Let's take today and thank at least 5 of those people.  And then once you are done here, maybe spread some of that around to others as well!?  Everyone would love to hear a thank you, an I appreciate you, an I love you...just because we think they know that...it still doesn't hurt to hear it!" ~ Friday Five Group Prompt

1. I'm grateful I found my heavenly Father, not in the church, but in my heart. I'm grateful He led me away from the misinterpretations of others, and He helped me understand the truth about his love.

2. I'm grateful to my husband, my best friend, my soul one. I know we have something rare, and I cherish it. I can't imagine my life without him.

3. I'm grateful to my sons. They are a gift. They have taught me more about love than I thought possible and have made me a better person by allowing me to become a parent.

4. I'm grateful to have extended family. Good times and bad, they helped shape me, and when needed most, I do believe they will be there for me.

5. I'm grateful for all of my friends. I can wrap my arms around some of them, and some I can't,  but they all count and are dear to me. 

The Power Of Choice

"Children learn how to make good decisions by making decisions, not by following directions." - Alfie Kohn.

This is another reason why unschooling works so well. When you don't interrupt a child's natural curiosity and you help facilitate their right to choose, they will develop great decision making skills.

I am a horrible decision maker because I'm afraid of failure. I was raised in public school. Follow these directions and do it this way. Memorize these answers and I'll give you a test. You better score highly on the test if you want to please us. I will probably be forever deschooling myself, learning to trust myself.

I'm grateful my children are growing up differently. Within the boundaries of safety, they are given complete freedom to decide. Except for our expectations of love and respect they are free to fail or succeed. I know they learn from both outcomes, perhaps even more from failure.

They carve their own paths, using inspiration from the world around them, but always deciding for themselves the steps, the pace, the direction.

Cool! I just discovered I was marinating the laundry. I guess this is what happens when you wake up at 3:30am and can't fall back to sleep. I need a self closing lid on the washing machine.

Where Did This Come From?

DS11, soon to be DS12, just asked me what it was like to be a parent. He's sitting over there, gaming away, while I'm checking up on all of your Facebook updates, and he casually drops that one on me.

This is a push the chair away from the computer moment.

I'm back now. I told him the answer to this question could not easily be summed up with just a few sentences, but I did my best.

I told him being a parent is a gift. It changes your life in ways you can't imagine. Your life becomes secondary to the life of your child. There is nothing you wouldn't do for your child to make sure they are loved, safe and provided for. You learn more about love than you ever thought possible. You begin to really understand unconditional love from the direction of being the giver not the receiver.

Then I knew I had to hit pause before I began to lose his interest. :)

I asked him why he had asked me this question and he said he didn't know. He said he was just curious.

I love being home and available for when questions like these come up. You can't predict when your children are going to ask what they do most of the time. Homeschooling has really given us the opportunity to get to know each other in a more natural way.

Recycling Trees and Love

I couldn't part with recycling the Christmas tree yet so we moved it to the back deck for the birds. I'm hoping they choose to seek shelter in it, but so far I think they are  wondering how a tree popped up over night. There is a Mourning Dove content with perching near the bird feeder, but no feathered friends have tried landing on the tree yet.

If we don't get the tree to the curb for our village recycling, we'll just do it ourselves later. The yard waste area is just a block down from us, but then again, I could recycle this tree in our own compost as well.

My friend's funeral was okay, but its always difficult for me to attend a church that preaches a different understanding of the bible than I have. I appreciated the kind words spoken by her husband and the fact my family could be with me during this difficult task. I know its a good thing for my boys to see different cultures and different religions. I know my friend's faith gave her great strength and for that I'm grateful. I do still wish she would have had a better understanding of my faith, because it would have relieved the fears she had for her own children. I found it very uncomfortable to hear her preacher question my friend's children's beliefs at their mother's funeral. I don't know how comforting that was for them, if at all.

I had such vivid dreams last night, loaded with extreme detail. Part of my dreams involved my deceased cat. I kept trying to find her. I'm sure the next several weeks I'll be dealing with how to cope with loss.

Maybe I will find ways to "recycle" rather than give up those feelings. During my friend's service someone spoke about her feelings of regret for not sharing more time with Judy. Instantly I thought to myself there was no need for this. Judy would want us to continue loving others and in doing so, it erases all regrets. She did so much and touched the lives of so many. I know rather than regret, it would be better to find ways to reach out to others and continue Judy's spirit of giving. This is how I plan to work through this. Recycling the love Judy gave me.

Chocolate Will Not Solve This

The brownies are ready!

I made them because I thought baking and chocolate would cheer me up. I haven't eaten any yet, because I'm realizing, I'm feeling sad due to the loss of my friend. I plan on attending her wake tonight and her funeral tomorrow. I'm hoping my family and friends enjoy the brownies, but I know how I'm feeling can't be fixed by eating a brownie myself. I came close, but this time, I know its not going to help me feel better.

After Judy's passing, I've been thinking about cancer more than ever. My friend did not want to die and leave her family, and I know I'd feel exactly the same. My friend fought very hard for every last minute. Cancer scares me because it seems like everyone is getting one form of it or another.

I know this next statement has probably run through my head thousands of times, but with Judy's passing the volume and understanding of it is slapping me in the face. The best way to fight cancer is to never get it in the first place by eating healthy and exercising. Of course given our environment, it may be impossible to avoid all toxins, but I'm still shaken to my core regarding how prevention is perhaps the only way around this disease.

So I'm left wondering, am I doing enough to ensure I will be healthy and available not only for my own needs, but also that I may continue to share my life with and look after my family? 

I'm going to cry rather than eat a brownie. I'm going to cry it out, and then pray for comfort. Next I'll lace up my boots and walk. I'm going to take it one step at a time, constantly seeking ways to improve my life through healthy choices.

Now please help me eat these brownies, because I don't know if my strength and resolve will last.

Crying Tomten

NO! PLEASE DON'T PUT US AWAY IN THIS PLASTIC PRISON!

On second thought, keep us away from this naughty feline.

Friday Five 1/7/11

"Good morning all of you FF'ers! Let's start the New Year off with thinking of others!

January is National Blood Donation Month so why don't you tell us 5 things that you donate for the help of others.  Now this doesn't have to be something huge...if you are a grandparent and you babysit for your grandchildren while their parents work...in these hard economic times that is a HUGE help for parents trying to make ends meet!  A friend of mine is doing a Pay-it-forward for her New Years resolution...so it just got me thinking...what can I do this year to help more people. Give us your giving ways and lets all start this year out with our hearts!  If you are someone who has new ideas for this coming year, tell us your 5 resolutions to give in the New Year...or if you are someone who (as I had been in the past while raising 3 kids) maybe this 5 can allow you to stop and think of ways you can start this year as a giving year...just let us know your thoughts!"

http://fridayfivegroup.multiply.com/

Here's my 5.

1. I'll start with the easiest donation and probably the best, my prayers. Prayer is also the perfect donation for when you don't have anything else to give or when you feel helpless. It can be done on the spot, where ever you are, and can take just a few moments of heartfelt thought.

2. Goodwill - This donation really is doing me a favor. I feel so much better after purging away clutter. I also appreciate how the Goodwill organization near me is trying to train people for jobs, something in our area that is very difficult to come by.

3. I'm a Bell Ringer for the Salvation Army. I do this in memory of my immigrant grandparents who were helped out by this organization when they first came to this country and when they struggled through the depression. Its also fun and helps get me in the Christmas spirit of giving being witness to so many people dropping money into the buckets.

4. I help both "light the tree" and "light the night" in an effort to stop cancer. Unfortunately, next Christmas I'll have more white lights on our community's memory tree, having lost more friends and family to this evil disease.

5. I feed the neighborhood posse and provide a safe place for them to hang out, away from drugs and alcohol. All through the years, we've opened up our home to the boys' friends, letting them know they are always welcome. Our Game Cave is a neighborhood favorite, plus I benefit from getting to know the friends of my children.

And here are 5 more I want to start in 2011!

1. Meals on Wheels
2. Our local Care Closet - its both a second hand goods store and a food pantry for our village
3. Child abuse prevention
4. Restoring our parks and creating walking paths
5. My neighbors - I know my neighbor across the street, having just lost his wife, will need more TLC visits and I'd love to bake up a little more friendship for all of my neighbors.

Fess up! Who turned up the gravitational pull today!!

Embracing chillax mode today. I will not worry about the future. I will not worry about the future. I will not worry about...

On my autodidact agenda today, playing around with Japanese & Mayan multiplication, microgreens and researching work at home careers.

I'm 2 for 2 so far in 2011! Two great days spent in my nest, doing what I enjoy with people I love.

Thoughts On New Year's Day 2011

I've spent most of New Year's Day, before watching the depressing Rose Bowl game, watching old videos of my children. Now I'm feeling sad because those little guys are gone, never to return. I am proud of the young men they have become, but recalling those early days causes me to mourn the end of their childhoods. Where has the time gone and how did we get here?

We spent New Year's Eve at home, enjoying Canadian Walleye. I'm blessed to have a husband who loves to cook fish. It was so tasty, I'm thinking we need a bigger freezer and a vacation home on a lake in Canada. It's probably too cold and the growing season too short for me to really be able to live up there, but those cold waters make some tasty eating fish! G-Ma brought over steaks to go with our supper, making it a surf and turf night.

We watched ridiculous TV midnight countdowns until midnight. Is it just me, or do these shows get worse every year?

The menfolk stayed up for midnight gaming, but I was ready to pass out by 1:00am. I did get up early and work from home, so this is probably why I was such a lightweight. 

I've really enjoyed working from home these past two weeks. I wish I knew a way to make this a permanent situation. I can get so much done without the interruptions at the pool. I love not having to drive too! I guess it will feel good to get back to the routine and to see the many friendly faces at work. I've been having trouble trying to figure out what day of the week its been lately.

I'm still getting used to my medication. I feel good most of the day, but always around 3:00-4:00pm, I start to feel lightheaded and my stomach feels iffy. It's not quite nausea, but it's borderline. After supper, I usually feel better. I'm wondering if this medication is doing something to my blood sugar levels. My blood pressure readings have all been in the safe zone though, so that is good. I'm going to make some adjustments to my eating schedule, and see if that helps.

I'm off now, to kick back and relax. I feel like doing some old fashioned writing. The kind where there isn't a glowing rectangle staring you in the face. I need to feel the pen across the paper.

Have a Happy New Year!
 

Pizza Restaurant Style Breadsticks

Description:
These are so easy and taste so good, we'll never buy breadsticks from expensive Pizza Hut or Rocky's again. DH said they really do taste better than what you can get from the pizza chains.

I found the recipe doing a Google search for "Pizza Hut breadstick recipe" but I had to alter the recipe and add more flour to get the right consistency. They come out chewy on the inside, crunchy on the out.

Ingredients:
1 1/2 C hot water
2 T sugar
1/2 t salt
1/2 C non fat dried milk powder
1 T yeast
3-4 C of flour
1/3 C melted butter
Garlic powder
grated Parmesan cheese
oregano or Italian spice blend

Directions:
Dissolve the sugar, salt and dry milk in the hot water. Add enough of the flour to make the mixture a soupy consistency. When the mixture is warm, not too hot, add the yeast and the rest of the flour until a soft dough forms. * I use my Kitchenaid and watch for the dough to begin pulling from the sides of the bowl and ball up on the dough hook. Add flour as necessary to get a smooth, soft dough, just past the point of it being sticky. Knead the dough until is is soft and pliable.

In your baking pan, pour half of the melted butter and coat the bottom of the pan.

Press the dough into your pan, creating a rectangle. Pour the rest of the melted butter on top of the dough and add your seasons to taste.

Using a pizza cutter and or knife, cut your dough into strips.

Allow your breadsticks to rise for 15 minutes.

Bake at 350 for 25 minutes until golden on top. Feel free to add more melted butter and seasons if needed when they're just out of the over.

Serve with hot marinara sauce.

My goal "word" for 2011, CHILLAX. As someone who tends to find stuff to worry about, I'm realizing I need to let that go and bring more relaxation into my life.

Christmas Weekend Notes 2010

I've just realized I took next to zero photos this Christmas. However, we will have plenty of video footage, thanks to DS15 testing out our new video recorder. He has quite a bit of editing to do though. The camera has crazy huge storage capabilities, and the boys shot video for hours.

Our Christmas was 99% most excellent! I loved having the extra time with my family and the bonus of having my parents able to share it with us. The 1% I won't mention except to say I'm still processing what happened and asking myself how I can ensure my family's safety the next time.

Christmas Eve we spent at my aunt's house. My brother and I both honored our Christmas Nerf War Truce. :) We feasted and had a White Elephant exchange in which we ended up with a cool Tapas cookbook, a veggie grilling pan, a book with a collection of short stories, and DS11 ended up with a Super Man T-Shirt.

When we arrived home Christmas Eve, a certain elf had already made some wonderful changes in our Sleepyhouse! Thanks to G-Ma we now have a water filter attached to our kitchen faucet. I love being able to drink water right from the tap. My Brita pitcher barely kept up with our drinking and food preparation needs.

Christmas Day we were spoiled with more gifts and more feasting. The day after, the grandparents left and we basically were in recovery mode, napping and watching movies for most of the day. The boys were in full out gaming mode and spent the entire day in the Mancave.

I began taking my blood pressure medication Sunday, and that night my reading was 128/71, which is much better than I had been. Could one dose really work that fast? I'll keep monitoring it and see what my week's average is.

My mind is shifting into 2011. We're planning to stay in for New Year's and enjoy a homemade fish fry. I think it's pretty cool the day will be 1-1-11! I want to sit down and think up some goals for the new year, not resolutions really, but inspirational ideas.

It's been so wonderful to have such a great holiday season so far. I really feel its going to propel us forward on good footing.

Getting Ready For Christmas & Blood Pressure

I've been away from the computer the past several days, except to squeeze in a little work. We've all been enjoying having the grandparents stay and visit. Last night, my mother made Christmas centerpieces for me and my sister. My sister and I both love birch trees so we're digging these candle holders. I actually have more like them somewhere in my basement storage. I'll probably have the boys drill the one log a little deeper so the candle fits in better, but isn't it pretty? It smells really good too!

Today is the start of our holiday weekend. DH is off from work until next Monday so we're all going to enjoy a nice, long weekend together. We'll finish up the last of the shopping this morning, and this afternoon we'll finish the last of the before Christmas errands, and we'll have supper at Mi Cocina. Our favorite Mexican restaurant.

I'm not getting as much work done as I had hoped, but its not often we get to share so much time with my parents so we've had to take advantage of that. I'll kick it into gear next week, and hopefully before New Year's, reach my goals.

Isn't it crazy how quickly Christmas creeps up on you? New Year's always comes up quick too.

I have been having trouble keeping my blood pressure regulated. Its up and down throughout the week. I've tried diet and exercise, but I just can't bring it down to a safe level on a constant basis. I'm feeling somewhat defeated, but I'm agreeing to try medication beginning after Christmas. (I waiting because I don't want to spoil my holiday with a potential allergic reaction.)

I'm bummed about having to go down this road, but I also know I don't want to have a stroke or heart disease, which run in my family on both sides. I'll be taking a diuretic to start with and hopefully that helps. If not, it could mean a beta blocker.

One plus is the doctor did mention my heart beat sounded really good. She said she could tell I've been exercising so that made me feel a little better. We also discussed how I'm probably not losing weight very quickly because I'm not lifting weights. She explained how especially in women over 40, weight training is critical. I hadn't really thought about weight training too seriously, but it's now on my list for 2011! Just one more piece to my health puzzle I'll eventually figure out.

My Sleepyhouse is starting to wake up, so I better get moving here. If I don't have another chance, let me wish you now a safe, happy and healthy Christmas and New Year. I hope its filled with family, love and laughter! 

Monday's Musings

I'm still having strange sleep patterns. Went to bed Saturday at 1:00am(Sunday), and woke up at 3:00am, unable to fall back asleep. My brain's been on overdrive.

Since I couldn't sleep, I read through the book, Wikis The Educator's Power Tool by Kay Teehan and now the autodidact in me wants to learn more about creating and using Wiki's. I should have been sleeping, not brainstorming.

Last night I got a little more rest, but had nightmares of aliens attacking the planet. I woke up thinking it would have made a great movie.

My parents are driving down a day earlier than scheduled trying to beat a snow/ice storm scheduled to begin this afternoon. I hope they are careful and stop and get a room if the road conditions get bad.

This rearranges my plans for the day. I have to get the guest room ready! I was thinking of driving to the pool - no joke - to take the boys for a swim and grab a few resources I need to work from home the next two weeks. I know I had just said how awesome it was not to have to drive anywhere, but after my Wiki brain storm, I now want to create a Wiki for work and I need a few things. Plus do I want to wait for my paycheck to be mailed? My checking account balance says no.

I had a discussion with DH about how the whole gift buying thing sucks the joy out of Christmas. Its stressful not having money and feeling the pressure to find just the right gift. I'd rather focus on being with family, enjoying tasty bites, playing games and creating laughter. I get now why some families take vacations this time of year and skip the whole material/commercial scene.

I should get moving here, open up the guest room and finish the before Christmas cleaning projects.

Maybe I Am Enjoying Winter....

These photos were taken when we met our posse for sledding last Thursday. We have a great sledding hill nearby at our local golf course. We try to go during school hours so we have the place to ourselves.

I've been noticing how beautiful the snow is this year. How it sticks to the trees, how it blankets the ground, it really is lovely. (Can you tell I haven't had to drive in it lately?)

I've enjoyed finding the bunny tracks in the yard, which have led me to their winter hiding spots. I'm feeding them some old, wilted carrots. I know the "God's raisins" they drop will fertilize my garden. That reference means something to my boss. :) I don't know if she'll read this, but after knowing her, I will always think of bunny poop as "God's raisins" now. Feel free to use your imagination as to why.

I was delighted to learn my parents have decided to make the trip down for Christmas! It will be awesome to have them here and share the holiday with them. DH will have short work weeks, so it will be great to have extra time with him as well.

December has been much colder than usual, and I'm concerned our truly cold month, January, will be brutal, but every week we get closer to spring. :)

I picked up the fish oil for Yumi, and she seemed to eat her kibble even after I dripped a capsule over it. Of course fish oil, I'm sure, is tasty according to cat taste buds. Hopefully it clears up her dry skin.

DH and I had a wonderful Friday fish fry date at Quivey's Grove. We sat in the converted barn, with its rustic, 150 year old, stone walls and wood beams and staircases. They had it decorated for Christmas with a very tall tree which reached high up the stable barn to the beautiful wooden roof. The lights made everything more romantic. I had almond crusted lake perch and DH had the battered cod. It was delectable! We've promised to try and do this more often. Its a perfect way to begin the weekend.

I wasn't planning on baking anymore Christmas treats, but after a wonderful discussion with a friend on the many different recipes available, I now will HAVE to make a batch of fudge for Christmas. Technically, it won't be baking. My favorite recipe is the sweetened condensed milk, melted chocolate chips, pecans and dried cranberries. I like fudge to be melt in your mouth smooth, not grainy.

My Brain Cloud Has Lifted

Fresh air and exercise really does work wonders. If the below zero wind chills would stay away, I could probably make it through winter without complaints. 

I slept better, but had stress dreams. Why is it the brakes never work when you're driving in REM sleep? And when do I ever drive through a crowded mall parking lot, pulling a trailer? I need to realize I can crash into anything bummer car style in my dreams, and my insurance rates will not go up.

Not all my dreams were stressful. I did dream of gardening, but waking up from the joy of having a hoe in my hand, and facing the reality outside the window, only made me want to fall back asleep.

I can feel I'm in the homestretch towards the weekend and the holidays. Tonight's my last night I have to physically be at the pool. Through the end of the year, I'll most likely work entirely from home! Yeah! With this weather, this is a huge relief.

I think today we'll call the posse and see if they want to meet us at the sledding hill. More fresh air and exercise is what I need.

Up Since 4:00 A.M.

I know when my boys begin to wake up, I'll want to go back to sleep.

I'm waking up hungry way before I should be, and having a before bed snack is not helping. I can't figure it out. I'm eating more protein, but the strange thing is, my fingernails are not growing very fast. Is this too much information for you? Seriously, I'm wondering if something is going on with my metabolism.

Do you know there is absolutely nothing on television worth watching early in the day? I would have gotten up and done something productive, but Yumi needed my warm lap. Poor kitty, I don't think she feels good either. She has a dry skin problem and is pulling out the fur on her back near her tail. I'll have to pick up some fish oil and see if I can coat her kibble in it. She won't eat wet food.

I'm without a car today. DH took mine, while we have his car looked at. I'm hoping its not an expensive fix. I'm grateful my co-worker will cover for me, and I can head into work late. I really am blessed with a wonderful job. I just wish the commute wasn't so far, especially during these winter months.

OH!! That reminds me, I saw a really cool meteor driving home last night! It burned a vibrant green. I guess there are perks to that commute.

I just wish I didn't have to share the road with morons. This time of year it only gets worse - morons on ice. Put your cell phone down please! I don't care if you have a 4WD SUV, black ice means you'll only slam harder into me.

Okay, do I want to try for a morning nap now, or start moving around and make a little noise? When I've gone back to bed and grabbed a few more hours, I wake up feeling off and the rest of my day feels rushed. If I stay up and don't nap, about the time I have to go to work, I will have to fight to keep my eyes open. I really hope I can figure out this body clock problem soon and get back to a normal routine. 

I've had to scrape the INSIDE of my car windows. This just doesn't seem right. Its technically not even Winter yet!

Saint Lucia Day Thoughts

Its very timely for me, having Saint Lucia Day arrive this morning, after I've allowed these cold, darker days to creep into my soul and dim my light from within. Today is the Swedish celebration of Saint Lucia, a symbol of light and hope. I'm not eating saffron rolls, setting a crown of candles on my head or singing, but I am taking time to reflect on how I can get back on track.

Its bitterly cold outside. I call it death cold. Its the kind of cold that instantly freezes your nostrils and eyeballs. I know there must be a purpose to this weather, but its difficult for me to understand.

I'm finding it so easy to gravitate to the negative. I know this is a choice, but I don't understand why I'm choosing it. Is it the season? The weather? A combination of everything?

Although I haven't become sick with a flu or cold virus, my mood is off. I should be content my body is relatively healthy, but at the same time, it doesn't feel that way.

I think I need to stop being so emo, and count my blessings. There will never be total security to be found in this world, but if I look for them, I will find the stepping stones I need to keep me on the right path.

Blessing #1 - DH's toothache went away. He was so sure he had something seriously wrong and was in much pain. When we called our dentist, the recorded message said they were on holiday break until December 27th. I prayed for him and by the end of the weekend, the pain was gone. It must have been sinus nerves, but he knows he still will need to have it checked out after Christmas.

Blessing#2 - Our house is warm, there's food in the pantry/fridge, and everyone is healthy. Okay that's more than one blessing, but when you begin to count them, its easy to get carried away. I'll stop numbering them.

Blessings to come- direct deposit of DH's paycheck should arrive this week. In the mean time, it was a blessing the bills due now were able to be paid. I need to stop freaking out watching that balance fluctuate. This is always how it goes when you live paycheck to paycheck, something I've recently learned, most of America is having to do.

Blessing for today, I have the resources to buy soap. Sounds simple, but I'm grateful for even the small things today.

I may be feeling blue, and I may be unnecessarily beating up on myself, but I also know today I can stop and take a moment to plan for how to turn things around. I can light a candle and remember even one spark defeats total darkness.

I will have a Happy Lucia Day and reignite my light within, bringing warmth and comfort to myself and those I love.

I need to count my blessings. Cold, dark days are closing me in.

Friday Five 12/10/10

"For this Friday let's read about five of your favorite things to do with Christmas...with a twist....you know me I like to do that....I mean who of you would've thought you'd find a word search here last week! LOL Ok so Five of you favorite things...here's how it works ...1. A Food  2. A Song  3. A Movie 4. A Tradition 5. A Gift" - Friday Five Group


1. FOOD - Cookies :) Christmas wouldn't be the same without them. This year we're making soft gingerbread, spritz and rum balls. I miss my grandmother's pepparkakor cookies. I wish I knew how she made them so thin! 

2. SONG - I've actually been avoiding those radio stations playing nothing but Christmas carols this year, but I am enjoying Sarah McLachlan's version of Joni Mitchell's River.

3. MOVIE - The Polar Express - I associate this movie with my children. They always enjoy watching it several times during the season.

4. TRADITION - Getting together with family - Beginning with my childhood and continuing now, Christmas time has always been about family. I loved going over to cousins' houses, playing on beds piled high with coats, eating Swedish cookies, hearing laughter and sharing the warmth of the season.

5. GIFT - Now that I have children of my own, its definitely more fun giving than receiving. My gift is their joy.

For the record, its now been two nights where I thought I was getting sick, only to wake up perfectly healthy in the morning. I'm beginning to think there is something in my work place environment giving me headaches. We'll have to test this theory again tonight.

Efforts To Stay Well

My hunger has increased, and I think its because its colder than usual and I'm exercising. For me this is a Catch 22. I exercise to burn calories but my body's response is to want to eat more. Anyone have any advice for getting over this?

I'm trying to eat more protein and fiber and continue to try and drink more water, but it hasn't been easy. I'm not a big meat eater, and I'm running out of low calorie protein ideas. I keep wanting to grab for almonds, but I know I can easily go over the recommended portion when it comes to nuts. I try to keep the correct portion in a bag and limit myself, but eating nuts is like eating chocolate for me. I never reach the point of diminishing returns until its too late.

Last night I thought for sure I was going to wake up with a head cold coming on. All of my upper teeth throbbed and my head hurt. This usually is my clue my sinuses are planning a revolt. This morning however, I'm feeling okay. I still downed for breakfast a pineapple, banana, blueberry smoothie for good measure. 

Maybe its the clementines that have been keeping me well? I was stoked to see them on sale at our local Pig. I love clementines! Easy to peel, no seeds, sweet and juicy, portable, what's not to love about clementines?

I know I have to watch my stress level too. It seems right around the holidays or just after, I get sick. I think this is due to the stress of the season, along with going off track with diet and exercise. Plus you tend to socialize more so there's more opportunity for germ sharing. I need to remind myself its okay to tone things down, take a step back, take a breather and let go. Doing so is less stressful in the long run when compared to becoming ill.

Crazy Dreams Start The Day

I woke up ravenously hungry at 4:00am. There was no drinking a glass of water and going back to sleep. I got up and ate two fried eggs.

I watched a few hours of early morning television, and when I actually started getting very tempted to call QVC and order a $100 dollar blender, I hit the power button on the remote and tried to catch a morning nap.

I fell asleep but had very bizarre, anxiety filled dreams, including naked tornado dreams. What exactly is going on in there brain? Who's poking around at those emotional folds? When I woke up at 9:30, I had this residue of stress cloud over me. Blah!

I know it my subconscious working on issues regarding change and vulnerability.

I'll stomp the "dreadmill", (love that name better), and commit to only one other goal today. Concerning the rest, I'll go with the flow and see where the day takes me.

Weekend Update 12/3-12/5

Filing away more wonderful memories in the fault. Friday we cut down our Christmas tree before the snow arrived. Its in place, and it now has lights and the star, but we still need to hang ornaments and garlands. Its been a work in progress while we squeeze in all the other fun.

Saturday morning we had to clear and play in the SNOW! We only got about 4 inches, not the predicted 9, but its more than enough given the fact our driveway drifts like crazy. I regret not building a snow person because the temperature dropped, and the snow became too icy to pack.

Saturday evening we attended my work's holiday party. I'm in trouble with my family because the white elephant gift turned into an embarrassing get up in front of a room full of strangers and open a gift that could be stolen from you event. I had told them I thought it was a just a gift exchange. At one point we had a cool light up necklace and wonderfully obnoxious jingling Santa hat, but those were stolen from us. We came home with dish towels, a village house and night lights. After the white elephant game, we all enjoyed bowling.

Once home from the party,  we stayed up late playing video games with DH. We gave him Grand Turismo 5 for his birthday. I read gardening books while they raced and started planning how I will turn more of my lawn into a productive food source next spring.

I've added the book, Starter Vegetable Gardens 24 No Fail Plans For Small Organic Gardens, by Barbara Pleasant to my Christmas list. I wish I had read it before last season. I love how she suggests building your garden over time, adding to it every year.

Sunday was DH's actual birthday so we took him out for a big mid-day meal at Outback Steakhouse. We eat there once a year, usually on his birthday. We all walked away more than full. Later, we skipped supper and just had birthday cake.

We watched the season finally of The Walking Dead. I have to say, I had higher hopes for this series when it began. We'll see what next season brings.

Today I have to get back on track with healthy eating, and I have to make friends with Mr. Boring, aka, my treadmill.

"Today for show and tell I‘ve brought a tiny marvel of nature: a single snowflake. I think we might all learn a lesson from how this utterly unique and exquisite crystal.. ..turns into an ordinary boring molecule of water just like every other one when you bring it in the classroom. And now. While the analogy sinks in. I’ll be leaving you drips and going outside." ~ Calvin and Hobbes

The Tree Is In The Sleepyhouse!

Its another huge Christmas tree for us this year! Every season we choose and chop down a Balsam Fir tree from the Winterberry Christmas Tree farm just a few miles from our home. I like Balsams because they are fragrant and native to Wisconsin.

We've decided to set it up in the kitchen this year. We didn't want to worry about spilling water on the new laminate. I'll have to wait now to install our new kitchen floor until after the season, but that's okay. I think I'm going to love having the tree here. Its very cozy! You can still see the tree from the family room as well. I'll take another photo after we finish decorating.

I thought we'd be the only family at the farm on a Friday afternoon, but there were several of us trying to get our Christmas trees ahead of the snow storm heading our way tonight. We could have up to 9 inches tomorrow. The boys are really looking forward to it. They love snow. I only love it when I don't have to drive in it.

I had trouble falling asleep last night. My headache returned, loud and proud. Why is this only happening when I try to go to bed? I eventually did fall asleep thankfully, but slept in too late this morning. Today will feel rushed.

Sleepless In The Sleepyhouse

My brain is experiencing a chemical crazy. Migraine on the right side, I'm actually thinking if I put my head through the wall it would feel better. Don't worry. I won't. I'll let my diarrhea of thoughts flow out and onto this fabulous white, electronic glow staring back at me.

I think I'm experiencing a hormonal shift due to the lack of sunlight. I think you call it "SAD" - seasonal affective disorder. I'm going to make an appointment to check my vitamin D levels. Its been so gray and dark, this has to be what's going on with me. Rationally I can't justify feeling depressed.

Although tonight, its not depression that's keeping me up, its anxiety. Again, rationally, I have nothing to feel anxious about, so this must be a chemical imbalance in my noggin.

I'm sipping Sleepytime, wrapped up in a giant hoodie and that is helping. Trying desperately to stay away from the kitchen area where chocolate is kept. I think I'd try eating cocoa powder straight if I go near the pantry. Its that bad. This craving for chocolate must mean I'm low on those feel good brain chemicals including serotonin.

I'm extremely uncomfortable. It began with my bed not feeling right, then my clothes, then I could feel every little movement and sound DH was making as he blissfully slept. Frustration turned to anger, then to tears. I could not think of a place to escape. I was left without sanctuary.

Freaked myself out thinking about how I needed sleep for so many different reasons, but wasn't getting one wink. Where was my sandman?!!! I have responsibilities tomorrow and people have expectations of me. I can't pass out tomorrow when this all calms down.

I don't even have a baby to cuddle and rock- the one reason I can think of right now worth not getting any sleep for.

Maybe I'll be okay. I can recall other sleepless nights where I still was able to function the next day.

The night before my wedding. Made the mistake of sharing a hotel room with bride's maids who snored. No sleep what so ever. At one point, thought of sneaking over to fiance's room to see if I could crash there, but decided I didn't want him to see me until at the alter that morning. Somehow I made it through my wedding day. I'm buying my future daughter-in-laws a hotel suite with a room all to themselves.

Strep throat Christmas Eve - Too much pain and difficulty breathing - I couldn't ruin Christmas for my family.

Chest cold last month - constant coughing all night long, yet I didn't miss one day of work that week.

Laboring with my second child - 43 hours no sleep due to contractions - still pushed him out in less than 20 minutes when I finally reached that required 10 cm.

I should put a foreign film on, preferably Japanese or Chinese, and try to read subtitles. This usually knocks me out as I try to keep up with reading subtitles, while trying to read also the actor's faces.

If I read anything else, it won't work. I'm an autodidact, addicted to non-fiction.

If I could make noise, I'd clean and purge, but my nest mates would not appreciate being awoken by my freak fest. Awoken? Awakened?

Surprised my essential oil trick didn't work.

Feeling guilty about not having money for DS11's braces. Like I can solve this at 4:23 in the morning? 

Tomorrow, I mean, later today, I will have to be good to myself and try to remain as relaxed as possible. Even when the cable guy is here for the 4th time in 2 weeks. Can we just drop Charter already? Will Dish or Direct TV work for us? I don't know and I shouldn't care right now!!

My Sleepytime tea is gone.

Yumi wants the computer chair back.

I think I should try again, even if DH's alarm will be going off shortly.

Cranberry Sauce

Description:
If you say you don't like cranberry sauce, its probably because you've always had that awful canned blob. Homemade cranberry sauce is so easy and so much more tasty. There's no excuse not to make it yourself.

Ingredients:
1 C orange juice
1/2 c granulated sugar
1/2 c brown sugar
1 12 ounce package of cranberries

Directions:
Rinse and drain your cranberries, set aside.

In a DEEP pot, stir together the orange juice and sugars until the sugars dissolve.

Over medium heat, add the cranberries to your orange juice sugar mixture. If you didn't us a DEEP pot, expect to clean up red spots from your stove top. The cranberries will POP open as they heat up.

Stir the mixture with a spoon, smashing the cranberries as they pop open. Bring to a boil and then remove from the heat. The sauce will thicken as it cools. Store in the refrigerator.

Pumpkin Yogurt Pancakes

Description:
Modified my whole wheat yogurt pancake recipe in order to use up some leftover canned pumpkin. Very yummy and satisfying. Its a heavier, moist pancake, goes great with leftover cranberry sauce!

Ingredients:
1/2 C canned pumpkin
1/2 C non fat plain yogurt
2/3 C vanilla flavored almond milk
1/4 t pumpkin pie spice
1/2 t baking powder
1/4 t baking soda
1 C whole wheat flour

Directions:
Stir together the pumpkin, yogurt, milk. Mix together the pumpkin pie spice, baking powder, baking soda and flour. Combine together until mixed. Batter will be thick. Add more almond milk if you prefer.

Heat a non-stick skillet to medium, high. Add in a pat of Smart balance or butter and dollop batter into the pan, forming a circle or any other shape you like. This batter is very thick so watch for the edges to firm and brown before flipping. (You won't see bubbles break the surface.)

Enjoy with your choice of topping.

My Melon Boys Are Back At It!!

I said I'd never fly, but I'm willing to be molested by the TSA for Blind Melon. In an alternate universe, DH and I had the money and free time to travel to Colorado this past weekend, and later this February to New Mexico. After two years, Blind Melon has reunited for a few select shows. I'm so excited for them, and hoping all goes well and they decide to continue with it. Hopefully they will book some shows in my neck of the woods since I really can't afford plane tickets. 

We had a great Thanksgiving weekend, although by the end of it, I was starting to feel a little blue. I was sad it was all over, and depressed we did not cut down a Christmas tree.  I needed one more day to fit it all in. We'll have to get our tree next weekend.

We began our Christmas shopping online, and I'm hoping we can do it all this way. Finger clicking is so much easier than crowded parking lots and long lines. I'm really hoping we can finish up soon, and the rest of the season I can just focus on the fun.

I have requests already for Spritz and Gingerbread reindeer cookies. I can't wait to start baking! If DS11 agrees to give up the rest of his Halloween stash, I may even make a gingerbread house this year.

Hmm..... Forget turkey, what else can I eat with cranberry sauce? Its too good to go to waste.

I wish the Christmas shopping was already finished. I have no idea where to start or what to get. Nothing tempted me on Black Friday, and so far I haven't heard of any great deals for Cyber Monday either. When I ask my family to make wish lists, they even are having a difficult time coming up with things.

Happy Thanksgiving! Our bird's roasting, the slow cooker is stuffed with dressing, Texas rolls are rising. I'm going to enjoy the day with family in our Sleepyhouse.

Wednesday tasks - prepare pumpkin cheesecake, make sweet potato casserole, yet another run to the grocery store, deposit money at the credit union, never did get that table from my sister's yet, rolls out to rise, pay insurance bill, cut DS's hair, laundry, drive to work and back in freezing sleet. On the positive side, DH will bring home pizza for the crew to eat.

Its A Good Day To Stay Inside The Sleepyhouse

Yesterday we were outside as much as possible. It reached 67 on my thermometer and it felt wonderful. Today's high will only be 30. That's a drop of 37 degrees in less than 24 hours. That's Wisconsin.

We could grab the winter coats from the closet, but there's lots to do inside to get ready for this holiday weekend. We have two days of feasting ahead of us, Thursday at the Sleepyhouse and Friday at my brother's. I'll be working overtime in my kitchen.

I was going to buy paper plates, but DS15 made me feel a little guilty about that. He can't imagine feasting on such a celebrated meal off of paper or plastic. I guess he doesn't share my father's eating spaghetti off of a paper plate gene. Even I will draw the line at spaghetti.

I have no idea how my father can enjoy this? I'm not talking heavy duty Chinet brand either. My dad will eat spaghetti off of regular, cheap paper plates, which sometimes even leave a hole after he's done. I kid you not, last time he was here, he was going to eat his leftover Subway sandwich from his road trip. I offered him some homemade spaghetti to go with his sandwich and he told me to just place it on his paper napkin!! I refused and put it in a real pasta bowl.

So last night, I was rummaging in the basement storage area, looking for my grandmother's china, packed away years ago for safety's sake. (I am raising boys.) Although I did find my other grandmother's silverware, I didn't find the china. :( I need to do more purging and organizing. To my surprise I found a box with photo albums. During the move 9 years ago, all the boxes were just moved into the basement, and I was going to unpack them as needed. Funny how 9 years can go by and you begin to realize what you really can live without.

I moved the photo albums to a safer place and have vowed to continue to work on the basement storage, box by box. I will have to get my scanner working. I found the picture I took with Arnold Schwarnenegger! He's in his Conan The Barbarian stage, and I'm in my awkward preteen hair stage. Its hilarious!!

I also found a scrapbook I had made during my puppy love days of dating my now DH. Too bad I stuck those high school notes we wrote to each other, along with the movie ticket stubs to the adhesive back of those ill fated photo albums from the 80's. I can't remove them without damaging them.

I have one box of glassware and plates I'm bringing to Goodwill. I'm looking forward to doing this, box by box until my basement storage area is better organized. I'm ready to say goodbye to stuff we don't need, while still knowing what to keep for sentimental value. We'll have to use our regular ceramic dinnerware for Thanksgiving, but maybe by next year, I will have found Grandma's china.

Tuesday's plan- More cleaning and I'll prepare the cranberry sauce using Wisconsin cranberries of course. Plus, I have to stop by my sister's house to pick up the extra table. Maybe one last run to the Pig to be sure we have everything.

Black Bean, Tomato and Corn Stoup

Description:
This is a super quick, pull together stoup. Add water if you want a soup consistency. I tend to like my soups thick, between a stew and soup= stoup.

I used a pint of canned tomatoes from my garden. I could taste summer!

Ingredients:
1 T olive oil
1 large onion, chopped
2 cloves of garlic, chopped
1 pint of tomatoes, with the juice
1 can of black beans, rinsed and drained
1 C frozen sweet corn
2 packets of no sodium, no MSG, beef broth powder- (I use Herb Ox brand which uses one packet to make one cup of broth, however I don't add any water.)
2 t cumin


Directions:
Heat the onions and garlic in the olive oil. Add the rest of the ingredients and cook until its tasty.

Weekend Notes 11/22/10

We made this past weekend a full one, touching all the bases I had wanted to. The cleaning got started, and we finished the transition piecing over the stairs and between the living room and hallway. All that is officially left is to nail in the quarter round and we are done! We also feasted on bagels and cream cheese and saw the latest Harry Potter movie. Now I have to keep the momentum going.

I really don't like that its dark before 4:30pm, and I know it will only get worse. My body hasn't adjusted yet to it. It starts getting dark, and I start shutting down. If I plant roots on the couch, I'm done for. After Thanksgiving, I will have to light up the Christmas lights and candles and find the night owl within me.

We watched the documentary film, Best Worse Movie, which I found to be very interesting. Its the cast of Troll 2, twenty some years later, recalling what it was like to make this so bad its good movie. None of the actors knew they were making a bad movie at the time and now, years later, it's become a cult classic because it is so ridiculously bad. Of course the director still stands behind his work, not quite understanding the only reason why some people love it is because its so badly made and acted. He doesn't understand that sometimes in life, its worth it to laugh at yourself and admit you're not perfect.

I think we all need to do this more often. We're all designed to fail, in some instances through several attempts. Being able to not take it so seriously and find your sense of humor can mean the difference between stressing out or having fun while trying. I want to be the kind of person that laughs through life rather than be brought down by frustration.

Well, I better get moving and grooving and take advantage of another warmer day for walking. In only a few short days, I may be forced to make peace with the dreaded treadmill.

Today's agenda - clean and straighten up the Sleepyhouse, set out plates, platters, silverware and tablecloths for Thursday's feast.

Time to make room to defrost the bird in the fridgy.

Yeah! The weekend is here! I'm going to try and mix a little fun in with responsibility. On the agenda, cleaning, bagel run and Harry Potter, maybe not necessarily in that order. :)

I know its not considered healthy, but I so need a huge, Diet Coke right now. Why is it I can go a long time soda free but suddenly get that overwhelming urge for carbonated refreshment?

Friday Five 11/19/10

Good Morning Fivers!!! Our hostess is having a little surgery and she asked me to fill in this week ...so here we go...it's almost Turkey time for most of us here ...RU excited??? Gosh the holiday season is here....of course I kind of think it really starts with Halloween but when you go in the grocery store and start seeing big ol' displays of oil for frying turkeys and stacks of flour, sugar, and cake mixes..lol...you know it's getting close!! So this week fivers let's talk Turkey....tell us five of dishes that grace your table on Turkey day...past or present. Remember to post your link here so we can all have a look and see what's cooking at your house this year! Have a wonderful Friday ...happy Fiving...Be blessed...Loveyameanit..Queenie

1. Stuffing, known by some as "dressing" - To me this is the best dish on the table. This year I'm trying a recipe with dried cranberries and granny smith apples in it. How can it not be yummy?!

2. Sweet potatoes with pecan topping - A few years ago, my mother in law shared the best recipe for sweet potatoes with me. It has a corn flake, pecan and brown sugar topping that's way better than any marshmallow monstrosity. Its now become our traditional way we enjoy sweet potatoes on Thanksgiving and Christmas.

3. Corn - Simple and sweet, we always use frozen, never canned.

4. Garlic mashed potatoes - I always leave the skins on for added nutrition.

5. Gravy - This is a must have on Thanksgiving. On the turkey, on the potatoes, on the stuffing, its all good!

What This Autodidact Has Been Up To....

I can make you like me in 90 seconds. I've been reading Nicholas Boothman's follow up book, Convince Them In 90 Seconds. Its really helping me come out of my marketing shell. I've never like salespeople, and as much as I hated to realize how we all must be salespeople in one way or another at certain times throughout life, I never could see myself as one. This book is my A-HA! I get it now.

I've also been researching Nordic Walking. For months now DS11 and I have been going on almost daily walks. Its definitely become a habit and way of life for me, and now I'm ready to amp it up. I want to be a CHICK WITH STICKS!

Nordic walking utilizes special walking poles, or if you're European, "sticks", to enhance your workout. You end up using 90% of your body rather than the usual 70% during normal walking. Regular hiking poles, or walking sticks are not the same as Nordic walking poles. Nordic walking poles are designed with special feet and quality poles remove the vibration from impact. They're on my Christmas list but I'm having a difficult time deciding whether I want wrist straps or not. There's pros and cons to both. Anyone ever try these?

We've managed to install the laminate flooring through the hallway, so this ongoing project continues forward. All that is left now is transitions and trim work. I wish we would have done this years ago. Laminate flooring is so much easier to keep clean. It feels great on my bare feet. I'm not finding it cold at all. I just wish we had the time and money to do all the floors in the Sleepyhouse this way.

I was so happy to hear DH is looking forward to Thanksgiving, and honestly, I am too. I'm looking forward to the entire holiday season. After spending last year in unemployment stress, it will be great to enjoy this year's holiday season without that dark cloud looming over us. Our free Piggly Wiggly turkey is in the freezer- note to self - MOVE TO FRIDGE ON SUNDAY!!

I'm planning on making the typical dishes my family enjoys at Thanksgiving, roasted turkey, garlic mashed potatoes, sweet corn, sweet potato casserole, sage stuffing/dressing, and Texas rolls. I'd also like to try and make my first pumpkin cheesecake with a gingersnap crust. I'm hoping to try and make everything more healthy this year, not using butter and using non-fat cream cheese. I hope everything turns out well. We'll have cousins joining us, along with G-Ma. The following day, we'll do it all over again at my brother's. Hmmm... maybe I'll be needing those Nordic Walking poles before Christmas?!

Speaking of walking, my trainer is up, fed and ready for me to lace up my shoes. Have a great Hump Day!

Caramel Chocolitas

Description:
This is a bar cookie to rule them all. Wait, who am I kidding. This isn't a bar COOKIE but rather a CANDY bar. Amazing bites of heaven await the person willing to try these. Cut into small pieces or risk sugar overload. They are more than worthy of the exercise it will take you to burn them off.

Ingredients:
2 C flour
1 3/4 C oats
1 1/2 C brown sugar
1 t baking soda
1/4 t salt ( I omitted this.)
1 C butter, melted
1 14 ounce package of caramels, unwrapped
1/3 C milk
2 C semi-sweet chocolate chips
1 C milk chocolate chips ( I used all semi-sweet and it still turned out great.)
1 C chopped pecans

Directions:
Preheat your oven to 350

Line a 9 x 13 x 2 pan with foil and spray with non-stick spray

Mix together the flour, oats, brown sugar, baking soda and salt.

Add the melted butter and mix until crumbly

Reserve half of this mixture, about 2 1/2 cups

Press the remaining crumb mixture into your pan

Mix the chocolate chips and pecans and spread over the bottom crust

Melt the caramels and milk in the microwave on 50% power 4-6 minutes

Pour the caramel mixture over the chocolate chips and pecans

Top with the reserved crumb mixture

Bake for 20-25 minutes

Remove from the oven and cool in the pan on a wire rack before lifting out and cutting into bars.

Friday Five

"For this week I have been thinking...with all the holidays coming up, and just every day stress...what 5 things do you do JUST for you, to help you relax, unwind, destress when you have had enough tension and just need a break?" ~ Friday Five

 http://fridayfivegroup.multiply.com/

Here's my 5.

1. I day dream I'm in an alternative universe creating the perfect world for me. It helps me to think in another reality, I'm living stress free. :)

2. Chocolate - in any form

3. I open up a window to the world, otherwise known as an internet browser and satisfy my autodidact cravings.

4. I change the scenery. Either physically moving myself elsewhere, or moving what's around me.

5. I make him, make me laugh. Everyone needs a humor hero in their lives.

Just Get Me To The Weekend Please....

I'm officially riding the current now. The wind has left my sails.

Although it was great to see family at my uncle's funeral service, I know it was a very difficult day for many of them, saying goodbye.

I'm thinking about writing my own obituary. My uncle's pastor was newer to their church and although she did her best, listening to her I realized I want to write my own obituary so it includes more of a goodbye message to my loved ones. My obituary is also my last chance for ME to say who I was in this world, not necessary what others may have thought of me.

Of course now I'm thinking, why does my obituary have to be my defining moment? Shouldn't I be living my life right now in a way that everyone can see who I am and what they mean to me?

I'm coming away from my uncle's funeral realizing if I haven't already shared my love, my beliefs, my passions, my talents and laughter with the world before I leave, then I haven't really lived. If I can't leave my loved ones with an abundance of happy memories, no obituary, no funeral service, will ease their loss and help them remember who I really was.

I hope in the days to come, I can find my groove and get back to living my life with a celebratory spirit. Right now I do know its my husband and my children that create that spark in me when I'm feeling fizzled out. They are the inspiration that fuels my dreams. If I can make it to the weekend, spending time with them will recharge me.

Quick Note to Self- When I get the chance, start planning and creating our "Oasis Of Culture." Books, artwork, music, film, bring more into the nest. Remember how you imagined how your home would look Dawn? Too much is getting lost in the clutter. Too many resources are out of sight and out of mind. Its time to make this change.

Firsts

Stolen from Kelly- Its been awhile since I've done one of these.

1. Who was your FIRST prom date?  I did not go to prom. DH, then boyfriend, and I decided to spend our money on the Amnesty International Concert. It was amazing!! 

2. Do you still talk to your FIRST love?  Yes, everyday.

3. What was your first alcoholic drink? I'm taking this to mean a drink all to myself, not just a sip of my dad's beer- a Whiskey Sour at a cousin's wedding.  

4. What was your FIRST job? I babysat and cleaned up at a commercial bakery, but my first official job was in a jewelry store. 

5. What was your FIRST car?  A green buick, LeSabre I think. It was a boat, from my Godfather. 

6. Who was the FIRST person to text you today?  I don't text. Seriously.

7. Who is the FIRST person you thought of this morning? My husband

8. Who was your FIRST grade teacher? Mrs. Keveko- She was really scary!! Thankfully she hurt her back and a good part of the year I had a substitute, sweet as can be. Interesting bit of gossip, Mrs. Keveko's husband left her for my hair dresser and together they began Gloria Jean's Coffee before selling the chain to become millionaires.

9. Where did you go on your FIRST ride on an airplane?  Florida.  

10. Who was your FIRST best friend & do you still talk? Lisa. We email/facebook every now and then.

11. Where was your FIRST sleep over? Lisa's. I practically lived there. 

12. Who was the FIRST person you talked to today? I said, "I love you. Drive careful," as DH woke me before he left for work.

13. Whose wedding were you in the FIRST time? My sister's. Too old to be a flower girl, too young to be a bridesmaid, I was a "junior bride". Embarrassing preteen nightmare

14. What was the FIRST thing you did this morning? kiss that same guy I didn't go to prom with

15. What was the FIRST concert you ever went to? U2  

16. What was the FIRST record/tape/CD you bought?  U2 Unforgettable Fire

17. FIRST hospitalization? C-section for my oldest 

18. FIRST foreign country you've been to? I've never been out! HELP!

19. FIRST movie you remember seeing? The Wizard Of Oz was burned into my brain. I'm still traumatized by the Wicked Witch. First movie I remember seeing in a movie theater, I can't remember? Maybe Coal Miner's Daughter with my parents?

20. When was your FIRST detention? I never had detention really. There may have been one of those times the entire class was punished for the behavior of a select few, but I remember being able to get out of it to go help another teacher. 

21. What did you do with your FIRST paycheck? Saved it.  

22. Your FIRST social networking site? Yahoo 360.

23. Who FIRST invited you to Multiply? Most of my 360 friends moved here, ironically, not many of them stayed. 

Requests have come in for pancakes, banana bread and lemon poppy seed muffins. I also wanted to make caramel chocolitas. Looks like I'll be spending quite a bit of time today in the kitchen.

Although I'm happy to see the scale go down and be able to buy a smaller size, it doesn't seem fair I'm burning less calories because I weigh less. I'm still doing the same work!

I've Already Lost That Hour

I've just looked at the clock, expecting it to be earlier than it is. This means, when you consider we've just pushed back the clock, I've really lost track of time!

We've had a great weekend. My parents came down for a visit and it was fun sharing the weekend with them. I didn't make any progress on the home improvement front, but it was still a great weekend. They've headed off this morning, to make the rest of the family stops on their tour. I'll see them again Wednesday, at my Uncle's funeral.

We watched some fun TV, Sharktopus on SyFy and the Simpson's Treehouse Of Horror. Now I can put away the Halloween decorations and get ready for Thanksgiving and Christmas.

I have an idea for a home business the boys and I can work on together, but its going to take an investment of a few hundred dollars of equipment. I'm going to start saving for video transfer equipment. I found our old 8mm camcorder tapes, and I really want to save them to DVD, along with moving our wedding VHS tapes to DVD. I started thinking about how since the boys enjoy everything computer or video related, they may enjoy learning about this and helping me with this project. Then I started wondering if others would pay us to move their videos and photos to DVD as well! We'll have a lot to learn, but even if this never turns into a business, it will be great to preserve our family's memories on DVD. I'm also hoping its a way to foster along my son's interest in video production.

I had a strange stress dream about work. I had piles of work to do and I was running out of time. I kept wanting to escape away from the desk to the pool deck, but every time I did, I would trip and fall. Once I almost fell into the pool. I think this was my sub-subconscious keeping me on task on the desk! LOL!

At the end of the dream, a co-worker was driving me and Mr. Grumpus home. Mr. Grumpus is a grumpy old man who swim regularly at the pool. He lives up to his hidden nickname 100%. In the dream, Mr. Grumpus told my co-worker and I he loved us, (in a brotherly way, not romantic.) It has me thinking this morning, maybe I shouldn't think so negatively of Mr. Grumpus. He's probably grumpy because he doesn't feel loved.

I'm so blessed to have a loving and supportive family. The weekend went by too quickly and now I miss them. DH will have to work late tonight too. :(

I suppose I should stop feeling sorry for myself and get my walk in before I look again at the clock and wonder where the day went.

Thinking About Tea & Exercise Planning

Yumi thought you may be interested in how I store so much tea in my pantry. I use a cardboard flat to hold the boxes and when a box gets low, I move the few remaining tea bags to this plastic shoe box. These sit nicely on the top shelf in my pantry and I can slide them out when I want to rummage for a tea fix.

I need this Friday. I have a few errands to run, but other than that, I'm planning on recharging today. My to do list for this weekend is stacked.

I was tempted by the Tread Climber, until I saw the price. We already have a treadmill, but I find it boring. I'm sure if we did purchase a tread climber, I would eventually grow bored with it as well.

My problem is, winter is coming, and I know the day will come when I can't walk outside. I have to think of something to keep my workouts going. Mall walking won't work because I'd have to drive 20 miles one way, to the nearest mall each day. Maybe I'll buy ice grippers for my winter boots. That's my main worry about walking in winter, slipping on ice.

I should start swimming again, but to be honest, do I want to drive in to work on the days I'm not scheduled just to work out? The commute time is equivalent to the exercise time. I don't think I'd stick with it, having to give up so much of my free time.

I'm just going to have to put myself on a schedule, make myself walk the treadmill while watching TV and maybe mix it up with Wii Fit and maybe as much outdoor activity as I can manage.

I just realized I'm a tea hoarder. I have 47 different kinds of tea in my pantry, and I don't dare admit how many servings I actually have on hand at the moment of those 47 flavors!

Thoughts On Parenting

I've been witness to too many instances of improper parenting lately. It floors me how some "grown ups" abuse the emotional trust of their children.

I know I've made mistakes, but overall, I try to give my children love and guidance without judgment. I've also been able to raise respectable, young gentlemen without having to hit them or yell at them, except for that one day my voice reached an unimaginable decibel level as I saw my son about to be squashed flat by an oncoming car. Fear and danger will bring out Mama Lion's roar. Needless to say, they never again tried to lay on their skateboards and street luge.

I've had a learning curve. With the first born, we did the "time out" technique, but soon discovered being a first born, he had a natural desire to please us. To this day I still have to watch my powers of guilt, so instilled in me from my parents.

My second born, thankfully, was given to me with a strong will. The very few times we tried "time out" with him didn't work. After much prayer I figured out what he needed was for me to trust him with responsibility. Getting into mischief was only a sign he needed a project he could take ownership of and develop his self esteem. His transformation from terrible two taught me so much about respect and what I should expect from my children.

I learned how to really think about what their needs were. Hungry, thirsty, tired, sick, lonely, these can all bring out the worse in someone. When I could stay in tune with their needs, harmony was easy. I don't know that I could have achieved this without being a hands on parent.

I had to respect and honor the person they were born to be, not the person I thought they should become. The only way I could teach them how to love and respect others was if I modeled that myself. I couldn't beat, yell, or shame that into them without being a complete hypocrite.

Now that the boys are in or approaching their teens, I'm realizing how wonderful the payoff is. Honestly, there has not been one temper tantrum in our house for over a decade. I'm finding my boys are not moody or temperamental. There is no teen rebellion. We aren't even seeing any sibling rivalry.

Maybe this is because we've always respected them and given them the freedom they needed. They've demonstrated to us how they are more than capable of making wise decisions when it comes to honoring and respecting others.

I can remember how my relationship with my parents had to reach a breaking point before they began to treat me as an adult. Its unfortunate we had to say hurtful words to each other through this process. We have a wonderful relationship now. Love and forgiveness really do bring healing.

I'm sure one day, more of my parenting faults will surface, but overall I know we've built a strong family, who will always be there for one another. I'm very grateful we've found our way here, perhaps because we chose an uncommon path.