I made them because I thought baking and chocolate would cheer me up. I haven't eaten any yet, because I'm realizing, I'm feeling sad due to the loss of my friend. I plan on attending her wake tonight and her funeral tomorrow. I'm hoping my family and friends enjoy the brownies, but I know how I'm feeling can't be fixed by eating a brownie myself. I came close, but this time, I know its not going to help me feel better.
After Judy's passing, I've been thinking about cancer more than ever. My friend did not want to die and leave her family, and I know I'd feel exactly the same. My friend fought very hard for every last minute. Cancer scares me because it seems like everyone is getting one form of it or another.
I know this next statement has probably run through my head thousands of times, but with Judy's passing the volume and understanding of it is slapping me in the face. The best way to fight cancer is to never get it in the first place by eating healthy and exercising. Of course given our environment, it may be impossible to avoid all toxins, but I'm still shaken to my core regarding how prevention is perhaps the only way around this disease.
So I'm left wondering, am I doing enough to ensure I will be healthy and available not only for my own needs, but also that I may continue to share my life with and look after my family?
I'm going to cry rather than eat a brownie. I'm going to cry it out, and then pray for comfort. Next I'll lace up my boots and walk. I'm going to take it one step at a time, constantly seeking ways to improve my life through healthy choices.
Now please help me eat these brownies, because I don't know if my strength and resolve will last.
8 comments:
I am sorry to hear ...I take a browines
Sorry to hear about the loss of your friend. Sometimes chocolate can't fix our problems but I'll take a brownie to help you out.
I'm so sorry about your friend. *hug*
I'm so sorry about the loss of your friend, Dawn. Cancer is a terrible disease. Getting healthy helps, for sure, but early detection is also a way to survive. We all need to get the necessary tests each year. We all need to be firm with our doctors and not let them be lazy regarding our bodies. We also need to pursue aggressively treatments for what ails us. Be aware and be smart. Do your own research! I hope you got your cry in, because you need to grieve. Will keep you and her family in my prayers!
Cyber hugs
((((((hugs)))))))) and many prayers for you and your friends friends and family.
My thoughts and prayers are with you. Hugs Across the Miles
Hugs! I am so sorry to hear this. I will pray for you and for strength for you as well as your friend's family. You are correct, no words and no foods can make this better.
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