Decompressing

I'm in decompress mode. I've been so busy, and I seem to be having more days where I end up lacking energy. I'm reaching the point where I need to STOP and CHILL before I over stress and make myself sick.

People were bringing me down. That's another sign I know I need to STOP and find my inner peace. A customer was really rude to me. I recognized she was stealing my joy, but I also realized, I'd rather she yell at me than have her treat someone else so poorly. I can eventually shake off her negative energy when I turn my focus elsewhere. Maybe this was why she was placed on my path? Because God knew I could rise above her brokenness and see past it.

I've been trying to get ready for the Dirty Girl Run, or as I prefer to call it, the Dirty Girl Hike. My sister has been a tremendous support for me. Others have not been so supportive. I've been told flat out, "You can't do this." I suppose this is because they look at my body and see only fat. They don't know this fat girl can walk over 3 miles, no problem. Thankfully my sister reminds me we are in it together, and we'll take as much time as we need to finish, and then I feel more encouraged. I will never be a runner. I'm just too well endowed. I can hike though, and I can hike for longer distances now.

The garden has been a good stress reliever. I probably should be weeding a little more, but I have been faithfully watering and picking off harmful bugs. My baby spinach bolted almost immediately, but I am still being rewarded with my favorite garden candy, Sugar Snap Peas. For some reason the Swiss Chard is really slow to grow this year, but my spaghetti squash is looking fabulous. Hard to believe after buying those sad looking plants at the nursery. The melons all look really good too. The potatoes have me wanting to keep building the raised bed even higher. Maybe I'll just try the straw cover at this point. The last time we raised the sides of the potato bed it took so much dirt to fill it. I cut the scapes off of the garlic and the leaves are turning brown. I think I will harvest it in 2 weeks time.

I was caught up in the idea we should have a summer bucket list. I kept asking the boys, "What should we do? What do you want to do to make this summer memorable?" We had a hard time coming up with answers and then one day I decided to stop worrying about it. I spent the day making silly videos with them and had a blast. It dawned on me, this is our summer bucket list goal. Just have fun and don't worry about planning so much.

I'm looking forward to spending the weekend with my family. We'll take DH out for Father's Day. I don't have gifts yet for him. A few things have been ordered, but they won't arrive in time. Instead I will focus on just giving him a good, weekend experience since he works so hard all week. We'll have lunch out on Saturday at "The Lob" as the boys like to call it. (Red Lobster) On Sunday we're planning a hike in the woods in Troll country.

One more thing I want to mention. My sister has inspired me to create a safe, calm, sanctuary spot in my nest. We're both frustrated we're not dropping much weight despite how much walking we've been doing. My doctor said, "Your heart sounds excellent, but after 40, its very difficult for women to lose weight, even if you eat right and exercise. Try add weight training."  I also read about how stress will prevent you from losing weight. Toxins are stored in your fat. When you are stressed, your body already has enough toxins to purge through. It doesn't want you to burn fat releasing more toxins to the mix. My sister and I both plan on making meditation and stress release a daily part of our routines. I also took it as a sign when I opened my Dove chocolate and the wrapper read, "Create A Happy Place."

I hope you all have a great weekend. I'll be doing my best to create one myself.