We are beginning to see tiny sprouts so I guess we're not failing at this garden project we are attempting. I think this is the lettuce we planted. The curious cat in me couldn't help but dig up our melon seeds to see if they are sprouting. Sadly, they looked like dried up seeds. I am now seed testing some of the seeds from the pouch. Maybe our seeds aren't any good? I'm not giving up that vertical melon dream just yet!
Life is getting busy again and I'm find myself struggling to let go and not sweat the small stuff, such as the dust bunnies rapidly multiplying in our Sleepyhouse. Mostly I'm concerned I'm not taking care of myself like I should. I'm a let go and ride the current type of person, but I usually do so without remembering to paddle towards my own needs in order to keep my boat afloat.
My next "have to do absolutely nothing" day is next month. How did that happen? I think I need to consider scheduling these days. It begins with the word, "No."
"No, I can't. That's my nothing day." Do you think this will fly or will people be offended?
Hopefully I'll be forgiven. Forgiveness is something I've been focusing on lately. Coming to that place where you can forgive even the cruelest horror done unto you, is a journey, but once you get there, oh there is such peace!
I've realized how important forgiveness is in the equation. Being a Universalist, I believe I'll have to share heaven with everyone, whether I agree with them or not. I don't get a say in the matter. It's really the same here on earth as well. I have to share my life with people that don't agree with me. This is why forgiveness is so vital. If I can forgive, I can live in peace here and there.
Forgiving myself is the journey I'm still very much on. Why is this so difficult? Who taught me to hate myself so much?
I came across a quote from a wise artist, (yes he's in Blind Melon.) He is referring to drug addiction, but it struck a chord in me. (No pun intended.)
"In no way do I mean to diminish the pain that you are currently enduring....
But....you now have choices.
You need to concentrate on your strengths, and stop feeding your weaknesses.
F**k all this junkie bullshit....
The loss of control should anger you...
fight the war and win. period." - Rogers Stevens
I'm not addicted to drugs, but I do lose control when it comes to eating and I fail to recognize my pain. To eat when I'm not hungry is to feed my weakness. It is time to get angry, but also its time to forgive myself and focus on my strengths.
10 comments:
Most seeds will not sprout until the soil is 80F to a depth of two to three inches. The weather here turned wet and cold and the okra seeds that I sowed ended up rotting in the ground. Luckily, the green beans mostly sprouted and I have a fairly nice row of green beans with only a few empty places along the row. The row was 61 feet long, so I should have sufficient crop on that first planting if I can keep the deers from eating them. The back veggie garden got flooded out, and plants sitting in saturated soil drown as the plants need air around the roots. I am hoping that the weather will turn back warm again because it has been way too cool for the plants to grow.
Passing through, hope you don't mind. The garden sounds like a fun idea, it's something my hubby has been talking about doing lately too. Just too expensive in the stores anymore and not as good. Good luck on your adventure!
I always enjoy your thoughtful blogs, Dawning! Forgiveness, especially of ourselves, is difficult at times, but necessary for good mental health - you are right about that! I struggle with the eating just to eat, too. Am joining a weight loss program through my doctor - starts June 1. We'll see how that goes. Another necessary thing to conquer. We DO have choices!
Forgiveness is definitely a learned habit as we get older. We grow to understand it's necessary for us to allow ourselves to move forward. Holding onto grudges hinders our progress as human beings. {{{Hugs}}}
It's something we all need to / should work on. :o)
About your garden........secret corners did make a good point about the ground temps. Everyone's had a crazy spring so I don't think plants are where they should be maturity wise. I wish you luck with the rest of your garden. :o)
Do nothing days sound superb. I'm only now allowing myself the luxury of doing nothing too. Well, not absolutely nothing, but I do have days where we stay home and do nothing. Saying 'no' and explaining your nothing days shouldn't offend anyone. In fact, you may just encourage others to make such a holiday for themselves. :o)
Food addiction. Ah, I know it well. Even tho I still eat when not hungry (late night is bad for me), I try to have only good stuff to eat during those periods. Fruit mostly. :o) It helps curb the need for munching and it's not full of bad stuff. :o)
Big hugs to ya Dawn!
Forgiving yourself is the hardest task of all. Albeit not impossible. lol. I took your advice and just went with the flow. Perhaps life is telling you to slow down a bit too. I get all caught up in "am I doing this right" and so forth. We are all work in progress. Enjoy the ride. I'll try to do the same.
BTW...you could start your seeds indoors in egg cartons and then replant them outside when you feel they are ready. I planted in the containers outside and then, for the first time in a long time, we got frost in May. So, I'm keeping my fingers crossed too.
I'd try planting more melon seeds. They probably haven't had time to germinate yet. Good luck with it!
If your melon seeds don't sprout you could always go to a nursery and pick up some melon plants. This way you could still have melons this summer.
We are planting lettuce tomorrow in containers and will probably get some tomatoe plants also. The weather has been so bad up here anyone with a garden lost most of their seeds and or seedlings. I am glad we waited
Forgiveness is the hardest thing a person can do, especially forgiving one self. Great Blog
"No, sorry, I have something scheduled that day."
"What is it?"
"Nothing."
LOL! I love that idea! I'll have to remember to do it sometimes this summer...summers are always mega-busy for us...lots busier than winters, because then everyone else is busy with school. ; )
Sending lots of hugs for you on your journey to forgivness and wholeness!
Oh forgiving yourself I think is a hard thing to do!!! But I do think it needs to be done. Just like you need to have the do nothing day. I hope your melons will sprout for you!!! Keep us posted! I hope your weekend will be great! Hugs
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